What is domestic abuse?

Domestic abuse is a serious crime, yet one of the most unreported ones in the country. The consequences can in some instances, prove fatal for women and their children. Confusion, anger and fear are almost always present in an abusive relationship and the practical problems of leaving an abusive relationship and family home are often overwhelming. Your abuser is entirely responsible for their abusive behaviour. You may need understanding, encouragement and support to help you reclaim your dignity and build a better life for you and your children.

By calling us you can receive support, you will be believed you will not be judged.

24 Hour Helpline: +353 (0)65 6822435

e: clientcare@clarehaven.ie

24 Hour Confidential Helpline (0)65 6822 435

The Warning Signs

Everyone has arguments, and everyone disagrees with their partners, family members and others close to them from time to time. However, if this forms a consistent pattern and you feel afraid of someone whom you are living with then this is a sign of domestic violence.

Below are listed some warning signs. Any one of the following signs is serious. You do not need to experience several, or all of them for your relationship to be abusive.

  • You are afraid of your partner or someone you are living with.

  • You are constantly ‘walking on eggshells’ in order to keep the peace.

  • You spend your time working out what kind of mood the person is in.

  • S/he loses his temper easily and over minor things.

  • S/he has hit you or almost hit you and/or your children.

  • This person has been abusive in a previous relationship.

  • S/he criticises your family and friends and/or makes it difficult for you to see them or talk to them on your own.

  • S/he calls you names and threatens you and/or your children.

  • S/he is jealous and accuses you of flirting and having affairs.

  • S/he regularly criticises or undermines you in front of other people – including about the way you look, dress, and/or your abilities as a mother.

  • You find it hard to get time on your own. When you do spend time away from him, s/he demands to know where you were and who you were with.

  • S/he controls your access to basic essentials such as the car, the family finances, food, the telephone and internet.

  • He has forced you to have sex with him or with other people. He has made you participate in sexual activities that you were uncomfortable with.

  • He has threatened to have you deported because of your immigration status.

  • S/he demands to know the passwords to your email account and social networking pages and checks your mobile phone for messages.